BW/AM Insight from Asian Males

Hello all!

I have some insight on why Asian Males think about dating Black Women (or any other women too that is not of their race).

I was talking to my Japanese friend on Facebook.

** off track for a sec - Dude is HOT! We have been talking to each other for almost a year and I never knew till recently, like a couple of weeks ago. Seriously. - on track**

Anyway, he told me basically that they have been told for all their lives that foreign women do not want them. They are not desirable to us. Plus, the Western media does not help either. ( He sees they do the same to my race to and does not like it.)

As they are told that foreign women don't want them ( I have told him otherwise), he noticed that foreign men want their women. He doesn't like the double standard at all.

That is all for my friend right now. I will ask other questions of him if you like. Just post them in the comments. He is straight and upfront with me. blunt and to the point.

Here is some more insight, I guss, from another Asian male who is Thai. No I don't know him and btw this part is SO NSFW!

His video blog about it.

For Uhura/Sulu fans. A pic from the vid of Uhura/Sulu action. I am only focusing on those two not the other people. Plus the picture just makes me laugh a bit.

Update on the Natural in Korea:

I have been wearing my scarf over my hair lately because I haven't been feeling well and I didn't feel like messing with it. It was braided in to sections underneath. But I as still turning heads when I went on the teachers trip this weekend. A few you Police officers (in training I am not sure), but they were cute. They were talking amongst themselves and noticed me when I jumped of the bus at the rest stop. They greeted me and told me it was nice to meet me. I swear one almost got whiplash when I walked past them and I happened to look back to see him crane his neck around toward me to watch me walk off.

As of right now I just did finger coils in my head.


By the way I get to go see Sexy again. My friend got me tickets to see his concert and ring in the New Year with him. I will try to get pics this time if I am allowed. 2 to 3 hours of watching him work it on Dec 31st into the New Year. Finally I can have a good New Year!


  1. THank you for your friends insight. I figured it was pretty much the misconceived notion that Asian men feel as though foreign women do not want them. Why does he think foreign men want Asian women? Is it because of the sex aspect?

    As for myself, I've never ruled out the idea of dating an Asian guy. In the area where I lived in Florida, there were very few! I met one in law school who was soooo funny and sweet lol. But I've always been attracted to Asian men (all men for that matter).

    The media can be a terrible thing. Hell black women were (and some still are) convinced that no other racial group found us attractive except for black men. As I got older and more confident in my skin, I realized this wasn't true. But for the longest you would always here "Girl, if he dates you it's only b/c he has a fetish". Why must we (as black women) be degraded to only fetish status. We have more clout then we know. We really do.

    However, I remember in school, this black woman said to me she would never date a non-blk guy b/c the only ones that date black women are those who have fetishes about us. She did go on to mention that they can eat some mean p***** to make up for lack of size (ROFL). Needless to say I had to leave her alone b/c that was a grown woman (in a professional environment) spitting that mess.

    I think with more interaction between these two groups things will be better. Heck, look at the way "Sexy" (as you call him...I like btw) was chasing that sistah on stage. Also, just a couple of days ago Yoochun was following an obvious sistah. What I know for sure is that we do in fact desire each other. We are curious about each other and want to know more. I also know that it's a helluva combination when we come together.

    Also, DN, is there anyway I can contact you (or you me)? I'm planning on teaching in S. Korea in 2011. Hopefully. I need tips/advice, girl! I believe you can email me by clicking my name (takes you to my currently unused blog).

    Have fun seeing Sexy. I know he's going to turn it OUT!

    Cute hair btw! WORK!

  2. This post reminds me of my holiday in Japan. I went out shopping with a Japanese friend in Harajuku and while we were at a store (ironically it was an "African store" in that it had African fashion and ambiance but was owned by a Japanese celebrity) the young man at the counter started questioning me through my friend. I was asked if I liked Japanese men, what I liked about Japanese men (hair, face, attitude or the whole package) and if I prefer Japanese men over Nigerian men.

    By the time he finished wrapping up the things I'd bought, the man said that he was surprised to hear that I liked Japanese men because he never thought foreign women would find Japanese men attractive. I ruled it out as just his unique opinion (at that time I was more embarrassed at being questioned even though my friend assured me he was just being friendly). However, after reading this it seems other Japanese men are duped into thinking foreign women don't find them attractive whether it is by the media or some other source.


    "Also, just a couple of days ago Yoochun was following an obvious sistah."

    *Screams* Links please!

  3. ...and someone else is going to have to go to TouchMarieOnline and just let me know what happens between her and Mr. Man here.

    I guess I'm too puritanical to do it myself.

    *bows head in disgrace*

  4. @ankhesen

    Lmao you're not alone on that Website of hers. I can't do it either

    And about her comments in the video, unfortunatley I didn't like the way she expresses herself. Sure she was open, but kinda ditsy too and Keni had to keep bbringing her back down. Didn't like the idea of how that can be perceived negatively. Then again she is a pornstar so let that be her inadequate excuse xD

    Anyway interesting video on the whole ^_^ Keni is a total cutie and Marie is a pretty women (just not the way she choses to express herself)

    As for the Japanese guy, we know they like their coo-hee- dark xD

  5. Coo-hee= Japanese pronounciation if coffee *

  6. @eccentricyoruba (NY Showcase Performance)


  7. here's a better fancam of yoochun from the nyc showcase.


  8. Thanks for the links Crystal and Jasmin!

  9. @ DN

    By the way I get to go see Sexy again. My friend got me tickets to see his concert and ring in the New Year with him. I will try to get pics this time if I am allowed.

    Sista gyal, get it done!

  10. DN - I've heard that sentiment expressed before on a site I visited. At first I thought she was joking. She mentioned how they are programmed to believe that they are not attractive to anyone but Asian women.

    It blew my mind for a split second. Then I thought about the programming of Black women in America and just nodded my head. I'm thinking very hard about this subject. Fear is one of the most dangerous motivations there is.

    @ Jasmin - I watched that clip and Yuchun is such a flirt. Of course some of the comments are "special" and predictable. :-)

  11. @ Lenoxave

    There is an awful lot of programming going on, isn't there?

    That would be a kick-ass post. Any takers?

  12. Sexy himself said that western women do not find Asian men attractive. It was when he was on Happy Together and he was talking about filming Ninja Assassin in Berlin. All the youtube videos of that interview have been taken down but I think you can get it from KBSworld if you pay http://www.kbsworldi.com/vshow_eng.aspx?vshow=23&vid=8795

  13. @ MG - The plot thickens. Seems like a whole 'nother can of worms has opened up w/this post.

    The programming is real and VERY serious. What is driving all of this?

  14. The majority of women, at least women raised in america, do not find Asian men attractive. This even includes Asian american women. Not exactly sure why this is so hard for you guys to understand given everything we know about american society. All of the emasculating portrayals in the media and negative stereotypes about Asian men in mainstream american culture are not only visible to Asian men but also to all of the women in america. If there was an implicit racism test for this situation, it would reveal that the majority of women in america view Asian men as inferiors, either consciously or unconsciously.

  15. @Lenoxave,

    I have no idea what could be fuelling the programming, is the media that powerful?


    A few of us are coming from non UScentric perspectives and though we grew up exposed to Western media emasculating Asian men we also consumed Asian media (I've been watching wuxia since I was a kid) on the side which means we got two conflicting messages. I formed my own opinions inspite of any media programming so yeah it is hard for me to understand.

  16. Oh I get it hunter, this is the same American media that goes out of its way to make black women look bad.

  17. @MG
    Sexy said that? This must be fixed. I offer my self to deprogram him. Thouroughly. >:)

    BTW, apparently I am going to both concerts. THe 6 pm and the 1130 pm. The one who got one of my tickets said so and that one is not enough! I can't argue with me elders. XD

  18. It's funny that this comes up, because one of my girlfriends (she's White, by the way) has a Japanese boyfriend, and wanted me to date her bf's roommate. I just came to the conclusion that A: I don't need your help, I'll find a man ON MY OWN, thank you very much, and B: the kid has dated American girls before, but they weren't WoC. Also, there was no chemistry between me and the guy when we met, so I forgot about him :)
    But it's good to know there are Asian guys out there that DO dare to date us, and take the leap into a new culture.

  19. About that video...I watched until I saw Ms. Thang stroll up in her little ensemble. Her saying "DSL" was the icing on the cake...I can't, in all good conscience, bear to finish watching that.

  20. I just came to the conclusion that A: I don't need your help, I'll find a man ON MY OWN, thank you very much, and B: the kid has dated American girls before, but they weren't WoC. Also, there was no chemistry between me and the guy when we met, so I forgot about him

    Good girl.

  21. @Moonwalker, those are the worst kinds of setups. Just cause his friend is dating someone you know doesn't make you compatible.

  22. I completely missed the DSL part, but that's my fault. Since the last 1990s, I've trained my ears to focus on the beats and not the lyrics to certain music. You can say it came back to haunt me.

  23. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!!! Bi thinks Western women don't like Asian men?! Dammit! Something told me to go studying in New York way back when, but I didn't listen!

    Alright, that's it! I'm going to have to break off my engagment for a few days, to take my behind on an "arduous" to South Korea and show this how APPRECIATIVE we Western women are of his PHENOMENAL talents. It may take my entire trip, but...I'll manage.

    @Hunter, the funny thing about general, broad and sweeping statements is that usually they don't hold much water. At All. I mean, c'mon, dude, do you KNOW the opinion of every Western woman that walks the face of the US and Canada and South America (because when you say "Western", I tend to think "western" as in hemisphere, not just the US). I know that Canadians view Asians differently, and I also know that South Americans (and Middle Americans) view Asian differently. And, regionally, it's according to which side of the US you're on, and even which city, to know the permeating opinion of Western women and how they feel about Asian males.

    Perhaps because of the programing that both sides receive there is the belief that neither dates, or is attracted to, the other. But - in viewing the intelligent discussions on this site, the variety of backgrounds that the women, and men, come from who frequent this site and the commentary (sometimes serious, sometimes entertaining, but always informative), I would say that your "assessment" is incorrect (not even to say that most of these women are "western"). I know from my fiance's perspective, he's only had one Asian girlfriend in his life, and that was way back in high school. After that, and from being exposed to Black American culture through his friendships and the Marines, he learned to appreciate Black women and primarily dated them. So, your "assessment" isn't entirely accurate, at least not in my personal life, but then again I remember by Psych professor giving me a stern lesson on using my personal life and biases as fact. Huh.

    /drops mike. throws up the deuces

    Now, about getting to Rain[bi] *plots*

  24. Since I am here and he has already seen me. I am willing to take up the task of deprogramming him.

  25. @DN
    Since I am here and he has already seen me. I am willing to take up the task of deprogramming him.

    Godspeed, homie. Take one for the team.


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