2.26.2013

Y'all....

(h/t Dulce Vita)

No, I didn't have some clever/witty/mature-sounding title for this ish.

If you haven't been to Beautiful Black Women, you may want to like their Facebook page; the images are stunning.  But that's not what this is about.  It's about this discussion, which I've painstakingly reproduced here.

I'm not here to pass a verdict; I'm just the messenger.  So don't shoot the pygmy.

*washes hands of this*

(Oh...before I go, Iittle tip: sit down while you read this and either have a strong drink or some sort of chocolate.)













50 comments:

  1. The second I saw that image, I knew f*ckery was going to be rampant. IR posts on public forums bring out the good, the bad, the ugly, and the hot-mess.

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    Replies
    1. Where's the link to the article? And what does this picture even have to do with it?????

      Delete
    2. Two VERY good questions. They changed the image later on (I guess it dawned on the mod that maybe that wasn't the most flattering Blasian image to use), but I never did see links to that article.

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    3. I'm not too surprised about the shortage of women in China these days, it's been going on for ages. All those centuries of dumping/killing unwanted baby girls has finally begun to take a serious toll on their asses. That having said, I concur with everyone else in the screenshots, the image is offensive & reduces black women to sexual objects; beasts to their lusts. Black women, and all women by default deserve better treatment than this. Not to mention it's terribly drawn.

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    4. Quote:
      And what does this picture even have to do with it?????

      EXACTLY. I only had that one question in mind, why did the moderator choose that pic to start a debate on blasian relationships. I think she's negatively biased.

      Delete
  2. If Chinese men want to marry black or African women for the RIGHT reasons, let them be. But that image is terrible and crudely drawn. It shouldn't represent those types of marriages, and it does not. The Facebook comments were unintelligible and just plain irrational so i just skimmed them. I will say this: the second black women marry outside their race, black men are up in arms. But black men have a much higher rate of marrying interracially than black women. Hmmmm.

    And all that crap about eradicating our "race"? Come on. And someone just had to bring up the penis size.

    This all just makes me want make my palms a welcome home for my face.

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    Replies
    1. Why is that with some guys,like the ones on the FB page equate being a man to their penis size? It's like they're saying you're a real man if you have a large penis.Its a major turn off with me when guys talk like that. Give me the real man which is caring for his wife, kids and community ,not men who boasts about his penis size.

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    2. Amen. That is what a real man does!

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  3. I saw the pic yesterday but didn't see an article attached to it, but I want to thank you Ank for posting the conversation. That pic is not for the right reasons and just plays into age old stereotypes of black women being hyper sexual.

    *Sighs*

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  4. Oh..Oh...so not impressed with that picture whatsoever. If your trying to promote Blasian love, how can one see it with this? To show this kind of illustration doesn't equate to love, but to being someones plaything. It may not have been the artist/authors intention, but it comes off that way.

    I remembered reading about Chinese men seeking African wives.Though impressed by it,another part of me wondered did the author thought that these demographics are marginalized when it come to the dating/marrying scene and just think that" Hey ,nobody wants you.. you may as well hook up" or that they're incapable of finding quality spouses of any race. Otherwise, its all good.

    Some of those comments on there was getting on my ever loving nerves, especially the ones about black folks losing their culture for it.Man ,I get so freaking tired of people using that excuse to be racist like that. OMG?If I go with a non Black man all of a sudden my genetics change because of it? Sometimes people have no kind of common sense whatsoever.Some of their same so called Black experts who claim such garbage are also the same ones who have no clue on what it is to be Black.I mean why is it that people have to marry someone from their own race to save their race or to prove their Blackness? I've come across Black people like some of the ones discussed on that FB that talked a good game about Blackness ,but end up getting nothing good from it because it wasn't about pride of self, people and culture. It was nothing wanna bee trash talk.

    Like the first poster said as long as both groups are with other for the right reasons why should it matter?One thing about love, it can be colorblind.If they happen to be of the same race, that is cool and if they come from a differe background its all good too. I wouldn't think that I would be diluting my race for having kids that are mixed.In AfrA history, some of our greatest freedomfighters were mixed race.Are those same idiots will discredit because one of their parents weren't Black? They won't have to worry about non Black guys"diluding"Black blood. Division like the ones we already have in our community and junk like this will certainly do the trick.As an AfA, nothing embarrasses me more than that.

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  5. I've been commenting a lot recently...

    The Comments:
    Wow....some people were talking sense. Most were not.


    The Picture:
    The picture represents the kind of relationship that happens when the man wants the woman for sex and when the woman wants the man for financial security and mixed babies. To be honest these things are not bad. It is natural to want to have great sex, be financially secure and have cute babies. But not these things on their own. Money comes and goes, sex can get boring and all babies are cute but that's not all they are there for. You have to look after them!

    Black people losing their culture:
    To be honest I have met some black people who really need to be aware that they are black and need to stop going around acting like they do not like being black and hating on their own. Aside from those crazy folks, I honestly do not think black people will EVER be wiped out. I have had a friend say to me that she feels black people are the most willing to disown their own culture and I think that's because social pressures put on us to conform. If anything the whites are the most likely race to be wiped out anyway. Everyone will most likely end up being Asian (including the brown Asians).

    Beauty standards:
    I get SO annoyed when people choose Beyonce and even Rihanna as a beautiful black woman. I do not blame them 100%, cause there is not much choice. But have you seen Beyonce these days ? She's starting to look less black. The problem is when people (around the world) see these women as beautiful black women, the LARGE majority of the black population looks....not so hot and feel ugly. The black men chase after light skinned girls or white women kmt.

    Black Love:
    Black love is NOT the best kind of love. REAL love is. Relationships take work! Every kind does. The added pressures on IR relationships are mainly socially created. Cultures need to be more accepting. My parents are convinced that mixed children are "confused". But I would not have known about my culture if my parents had not made the effort to teach me and teach me to be proud of myself! "Confused" children can result from any kind of marriage.

    African American/Korean American vs JUST AMERICAN...Question to the AMERICANS among you:
    A guy I know was asked by my African friend of mine if he was "african american".
    He said "No i'm just american, we are trying to get rid of that extra label". My friend looked at me and gave the me the *omg, seriously?* look.
    I was not surprised because a korean american friend of mine said the exact same thing to me when i asked a similar question!
    She said "I was born in America, my parents are Korean but I am not, I'm American!".
    I wasn't born in Nigeria yet I think I am Nigerian.
    Now I know America is the land of the free but couldn't this be something that is skewing the minds of the people. Not just the black americans but all americans. If America was truly a place with very little racism i think i wouldn't mind this mentality. But because it still has these social issues, I feel slightly hurt when these people deny their heritage. Love yourself before you can love others.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Labels are really ridiculous. Anyway, these people aren't necessarily denying their heritage. They may just be claiming their rights. It is all too true that African Americans, Asian Americans, Native Americans (and all who are 'othered') are treated as 2nd-class citizens in this country so to name yourself as only American is to say "I'm not 2nd class."

      *shrugs. Don't worry about it too much.

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    2. I do not see it has denying my heritage. I do not think that by calling myself an American I am devoid of 2nd class treatment either. Blacks (those here by slavery) in America have centuries here. We have very little if any link to Africa as far as language, traditions, and culture. My sister's best friend wasn't born in Liberia, but calls herself Liberian. Her parents were though so her ties are still strong to the home country. She always refers to us as Americans. I read an article last year about a woman who went to South Africa. She was excited to finally be in the majority. Her first day out though was a shock because as soon as they discovered she only spoke English they referred to her as American. So my question would be do Africans feel a link when black Americans call themselves African American? Do you think its an insult since we do not have links to the culture, language, and traditions?

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    3. I wouldn't blame people around the world for saying stuff like "Oh, black women are beautiful, yeah I like Beyoncé and Alicia Keys".
      Why can't I blame them? Because it's the American media!! How many very popular and currently relevant dark-skinned female African American celebs can you name from the top of your head without thinking much?
      Right. People bash Beyoncé for getting whiter and whiter on her photos but who's mainly at fault? Why do you think she managed to go that far in the 21st century's music industry? (besides being very talented!) she probably could have been famous and recognized if she were as dark as Kelly Rowland or even darker but would have she been that far? I wonder. With that said, I'm not saying Beyoncé is free from critiscism nor from responsibility in this.

      As for losing our identities as black people, I seriously doubt that. Many black people around the globe know who they are and love their roots and themselves. Yes, some don't, but that's happening in all ethnic groups in the West.

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    4. Black Americans are very American while Asian Americans are mainly 1st and 2nd generation. Blacks have been in the US for like forever. But the way the boy said it to my friend, sounded like he was very offended. My parents used to teach us about all the great black Americans and all the things the did in the civil rights movement so I always personally loved black Americans BUT i hear the majority of Africans feel they are different from black Americans. Most Africans find me very different, but I do not really care. Some people are accepting, some not. Even with me. I have met Americans who are very in touch with certain West African traditions. I think it all depends on the person.

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    5. Do you think its an insult since we do not have links to the culture, language, and traditions?

      No.

      So my question would be do Africans feel a link when black Americans call themselves African American?
      Although i said most think AfAm are very different. I always hear Af ppl say: "Black americans are from Africa" anytime something good happens. Or "Obama is from Africa". HAHAHA!

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    6. I guess that it all comes down to how this people were raised.

      For example: imagine I marry someone someone who is black and dominican like me, we move away to France and have babies there and years later someone asks my children this question, and they say "we're french". I, personally would feel like they dont want to mention the fact that they are hispanics. This, given the fact that I have taken the time to make sure that they speak spanish, know about our history and customs. If my kids are named Maria Perez and Juan Perez and dont even know how to say "hola", then obviously they are not gonna feel proud of who they are as hispanics.

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    7. @KarMell-yeah, but your kids would be first generation born in France. So yes it would sting for them to deny their Dominican side. U.S. blacks though are so far removed from Africa that I do not see that as the same. Are their Dominicans that identify themselves as African Dominican though?

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    8. Are their Dominicans that identify themselves as African Dominican though?

      Yes I have met some. But Dominicans first. Then ancestry Africa. But that is still different from the US, a lot of African culture is still mixed with theirs.

      I love Dominicans, so good looking.

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    9. Okay. Well maybe I'll be able to go and visit there one day. I finally made it to PR this past December, but want to go back for a longer visit.

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    10. OK, no one replied to my question so I'll re-write all of my comments very briefly.

      No need to blame people for referring to black beauty by naming Beyoncé or Alicia Keys. Blame the media and try to name very popular dark-skinned female black American celebs who are currently relevant, just from the top of your head, without thinking much. Not easy, right?
      Another thing: would Beyoncé would have gone that far without all this photoshop bleaching? It makes you wonder, that talent is not everything to be a mega superstar. And yes, she's not free from responsibility on this, but I'm just saying.

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    11. @Myra, yeah i blame the media but also the artist. Look at Beyonce's sister, she's being herself and she is not as famous, even though I know she has the ability to be mainstream, but she chooses not to. Rocking a fro :-)

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    12. I don't care whether someone wants to call themselves African American, Asian American, or just American. From my personal point of view, I am a first generation American (my parents are from Nigeria), so I don't really see myself as an African American since I'm not far removed from my roots. But, although I was brought up with a lot of Nigerian customs, but I grew up in America, so by default I'm an American.

      I have a friend from France who is half-French, half-Beninese. She sees herself as black, but not African French. Just French. She told me that the French don't see themselves as Asian French, African French or what have you. If you were born in France you're just French. That makes sense to me. It's not to say that she doesn't recognize who Beninese side, because she does.

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    13. I am a first generation American (my parents are from Nigeria), so I don't really see myself as an African American since I'm not far removed from my roots. But, although I was brought up with a lot of Nigerian customs, but I grew up in America, so by default I'm an American.

      Right there with you.

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    14. @Myra
      Blame the media and try to name very popular dark-skinned female black American celebs who are currently relevant, just from the top of your head, without thinking much. Not easy, right?

      I immediately came up with Nicole Beharie, Claire-Hope Ashitey, Keke Palmer, Wumni Mosaku... I could keep going for quite some time. Relevancy, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. You may desire to argue that the mainstream doesn't care much about these women and I'd probably agree if I was considering their feelings and not my own. I'm entirely too selfish for that.

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    15. @Myra-Another thing: would Beyoncé would have gone that far without all this photoshop bleaching? It makes you wonder, that talent is not everything to be a mega superstar.

      I doubt it. The same thing happened with Jennifer Lopez. She went from dark curly hair to blond straight hair. I often wonder if she still looked the same as she did in the beginning would she be as popular. Maybe. I consider Beyoncé more of an entertainer though instead of a singer. Jennifer Hudson is a much better singer, but not nearly as popular.

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    16. @Hateya: I don't know who they are...I don't know any of the people you mentioned. This is from the point of view of a foreigner (me), and I think that many others have the same point of view.

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    17. @Myra,
      I don't know what you mean by being a foreigner. I've lived in Asia for nearly 20 years, so I don't have any advantages in knowing upcoming Black talent EXCEPT via the internet.

      You issued a challenge and I answered it without thinking too hard. I know who these women are because I chose to learn about them. I cruised the Black media sites and targeted Black women, mostly dark-skinned, who interested me. If that was the case, then I'd invest in her in terms of verbal and written support as well as with the all mighty dollar or yen or whatever currency I had at the moment. Like I said, relevance is like beauty, in the eye of the beholder. Many talented Black women deserve more than they have and I'm chipping in when I can. Wishes aren't horses, so... Ciao!

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    18. I got stuck on people choosing Beyonce and Rihanna as beautiful part. Why would choosing them as beautiful black women be a problem? Black is beautiful in all shades. Slighty colorism-ish too me.

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  6. I came across this picture and wanted to read the article that was alluded to but not attached.....so I read the comments and got the impression that this might have been less an informational/article driven discussion as much as it was a chance to "clowin" and degrade this type of relationship. It is interesting because usually that facebook page has some good articles and discussions....I have pulled away from this group recent weeks because I have noticed a small minority of women playing the 'you are not as Black as I am game' and I have not time for that......

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    Replies
    1. I came across this picture and wanted to read the article that was alluded to but not attached

      Me too. I find it odd they didn't think to post the article.

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    2. I had that suspicion when I noticed the "due to a shortage of Chinese women" bit.... sure it's probably a factor, but what, are they scrapin' up leftovers or something? I think they're trolling with this...

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    3. @Rufus
      I think they're trolling with this...

      Yes, they are.

      Delete
    4. Yeah, I'm with you guy on the trolling part..After all Asian men /Black women are supposed to be lonely ,unhappy people who cannot have marriages/relationships, right (sarcasm).

      Forgive me for getting off the subject, but l was I was scrolling through Bossip.com .I was reading an article about boy wonder...uh-hem...Justin Bieber. Not that it ever surprised me,but if the article is proven to be true,then he's getting down with the"swirl" factor in London. It also said that Ella,the girl in question,wouldnt have been the only Black/biracial girl he messed with.Supposedly, he attempted to do the same with a Black fan (Bossip said that this woman may have been the unfortunate demise of the relationship between him and Selena)

      Now that all of this has gotten out, the evilmongers are making their case of how JB is incapable of finding Black women to be attractive and /or dating them (Sounds familiar with some of the Kpop fans). Its just funny reading their racist excuse.

      Delete
  7. Paring an interesting discussion with a vile picture is just passive-aggressively inciting us to go at each others throats. They (whoever they are) have effectively devalued the blasian discussion.

    Let's not pretend here, no one is trying to promote love with a presentation like that.

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    Replies
    1. EXACTLY.

      I hate it too when they use the topic of blasian relationships to get their ignorant views on politics and economics across.

      I've read some articles about Chinese and Korean men seeking brides outside their country (mainly from poorer East and West Asian countries), and their number one choice is not black women, more importantly their intentions have nothing political nor is it about sexual objectification (in most cases anyway), they just want to get married, period. And last I time I checked the ratio of men to women in China is definitely not 20 to 1 lol that's exaggerating too much.

      Delete
    2. Nope. Not one bit. I didn't even bother to join the discussion once I saw it.

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    3. What's ridiculous is those people who try to get their political ideas across by jumping into this blasian relationships discussion. Lame.
      Some facts were ill-informed, like the ratio of men to women in China is definitely not 20 to 1 last time I checked! That's reaally exaggerating.
      I don't get this drawing, most Chinese and Korean men who seek brides outside their country are not looking for black women but Asian women from poorer countries in order to get married. And even those who date black women are not messing around but actually sometimes get married with them, as being married is very important in those countries.

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    4. Some facts were ill-informed, like the ratio of men to women in China is definitely not 20 to 1 last time I checked! That's reaally exaggerating.

      Fact -- China's one-child policy is still in effect.

      Fact -- Girls are routinely aborted or murdered at birth.


      as being married is very important in those countries

      Being married is pretty much important worldwide. Do not presume that Asian men value marriage any more than Western men.

      Delete
    5. @jnguyễn

      They (whoever they are) have effectively devalued the blasian discussion.

      Someone tried to pull an old Jedi Mind trick here. Most people didn't fall for it. I'm concerned for the ones who did. Ugh.

      Delete
    6. @Hateya: I already know all of ths, thank you. You didn't say anything about the ratio I mentioned. I never said that the one-child policy was not accurate nor an ill-informed fact. And I never said that girls weren't aborted and abandoned.

      Delete
    7. I didn't mention the ratio because because it doesn't matter in a country where baby girls are routinely targeted and murdered. That person might have said 20 to 1 based on something he/she read/heard and you might come back and report 5 to 1 based on different documentation and then I'll say 35 to 1 and we won't get anywhere.

      Sometimes, people use numbers to express shock and horror, like targeting baby girls for murder in order to circumvent a government policy. Sometimes, facts aren't even the truth. Ciao!

      Delete
  8. Can anyone check if my comments are in the spam box? Thank you :) I can't see them anymore... dunno if it was the pc or the site.

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  9. Lifecoaster

    That picture is all kinds of wrong for promoting ANY kind of love. It's crude in more ways than one and over-sexualized for no reason. Why couldn't a tasteful picture of an Asian man and African woman be used? And those comments were making my head hurt.

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  10. The image above was done by a black artist from Kenya named Michael Soi. Using that image with a question like that will only bring out the negative.

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  11. The picture is horrible, I think that most of us can agree on that. I wish I knew what article this picture related to, but no matter what, that commentary is ridiculous. Throughout most of it I just shook my head. I wish people would think before they type. But it's the internet...right? :/

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    Replies
    1. The picture doesn't even relate to an article, it from a series of art done by Michael Soi. Here is his facebook page http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-art-of-Soi-Michael/188021591260258

      Delete
  12. Now to this post. That picture is disturbing to me. It suggests that Chinese men only want African women for sexual purposes. The article is what I would like to read.

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  13. After the comments went from ignorant to just plan dumb I skipped the rest and started looking for the article. I could find nothing that specifies what the OP mentioned. The closest thing is a ChinaSmack post and TheAtlantic article that referenced the ChinaSmack post.

    http://www.chinasmack.com/2011/pictures/chinese-men-with-black-women-african-wives.html

    http://www.theatlantic.com/international/archive/2011/06/chinese-workers-in-africa-who-marry-locals-face-puzzled-reception-at-home/240662/


    I doubt if one of the two articles are the ones mentioned by the OP. If they are then I fear that the OP did not read the ENTIRE page to realize that those sites list opinions not information that have been researched and are fact based (as far as immense African bride seeking is concerned). If that is the case then I understand completely why the "article" wasn't linked. But it is really disappointing to see a potential good discussion turn to the worse. but I honestly think the OP just saw a random article or post and ran with it.

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